The Best Speeches to Avoid Speeding Tickets

Most days you follow the limit. You know the roads like your phone number – 45 miles plus 5 allowance. You abide by it but today, the slug in front is bugging you and you sped up to overtake. Or you’re catching a store that’s closing down. Or Snoop Dogg’s on the radio and while nostalgia kicks in, you lost track. Or you’re just feeling adventurous, a change for a day. And then you hear that dreaded siren – it’s a cop on a motorcycle!

You pulled over, obeyed to show your license and then the speech. What can you do to avoid a speeding ticket?

Before you practice your act after being pulled over, the trick starts with the car. Make sure it’s well maintained. Clean it and fix all that is a noticeable damage. You wanted to communicate that you’re a law-abiding citizen and you look out for your vehicle.

Observe the road. See if there’s a highway patrol or cops on standby. Obviously, you need to show off when they’re around. Do not speed when you’re alone on the road. Stay in the pack of speeding cars to diffuse the chances – you’re just driving like anybody else. Just make sure you’re not the leader as they’re the first on target. Avoid the fast lane because cops lurk around that side and they know drivers often outlaw the limit there. Staying in the middle is the safest.

When you see a cop on the sideroad and it’s too late to slow down, wave at him. It’s more common for cops to be avoided than to be greeted. Waving will got them thinking and distracted. Is this somebody I know? If they waved back, then drive on.

Now, to the speech.

Kindly deny. Admitting it is sure fire to a fine. Never fight the cop as aggression rarely gets to anything.

Put on a dramatic face. Saying that you have to poop or something hurts is not believable when you look golden. Act with your excuse. This is more effective for women because not many can resist a sobbing lady than a weeping grown man.

Complicate your accent. If you have a foreign look, then use it to your advantage. Make your English crooked, grammar mishap and enunciation pricky. Make it painful to talk to you and he’ll dismiss you.

The Humorous Approach. Matt Hardigree of jalopnik.com can put up an excellent scenario.

Officer: Where are you going in such a hurry?
Me: Just keeping up with traffic, officer
Officer: I don’t see any traffic
Me: That’s how far behind I am, I was trying to keep up! (insert unfunny drum noise) “da dum ching”
Officer: Just slow down. (walks back to car shaking head)

If they don’t laugh just say “What are you, the joke police?”

The best way to avoid the ticket is not speeding up, but this happens. What’s your best approach?

Life Without Passport is Punishable?

A lot of Western countries have problems with illegal immigrants – people who, one way or another, made it to the other side of the border without being noticed. Or should I say without getting caught? Because those countries do all they can to keep outsiders where they ‘belong’ – out.

Stopping people at the border is not considered wrong. If you don’t have some sort of identification proving you may be here, well, then you may not. But what if those immigrants do get past? They build a new life in a new country. Should they still be sent away? Many would say yes, for one because immigrants don’t have that little yet very important paper we call passport. And second because it would be an invitation to others.

How do you send someone away? In the Netherlands, there was a guy a few years ago who didn’t pay for the bus. The ticket control then looked up his case. He, being illegal, was discovered and was sent back to the country of his origin. I don’t think there’s something wrong with this. The goal of the (ticket) control wasn’t to find out whether he was illegal or to get him out of the Netherlands. The goal was to check whether he had paid or not.

What if for example a police officer thinks someone is illegal? Is it right to walk up to that person and check whether he does have a passport or not? No, because that would be discrimination, a.k.a. suspicion based on appearance. The only way to not make it look like discrimination is checking a whole bunch of people. That would be checking a whole restaurant. But in a way that is discrimination too, why check this restaurant and not the other one?

What if you could find a way to check someone’s passport without discriminating and the person is indeed illegal. Is it right to send him out of the country? In other words, it is right to punish someone just for being somewhere? In my opinion, the world is for everyone. Assuming there is no way to check someone without discriminating, sending someone away would be double discrimination.

Talking about passports, what exactly is the difference between someone with and someone without a passport? What gives person A the right to be somewhere, while B may not?

I think punishing illegality is wrong, especially when someone’s illegality is the only thing someone ‘does’ wrong. But not punishing illegality would be welcoming whoever wants to come in. Is the moral wrongness more important than the practical function?

Will We Ran Out of Land to Bury the Dead?

The CIA World Factbook sums 107 deaths per minute worldwide. A person in a traditional coffin will probably take six feet in length and four feet wide of land space. Since lots cannot be next to each other, they’ll take more area for the cemetery.

Burying those who already passed is expensive in terms of land allocation. The Woodlawn Cemetery in New York covers more than 400 acres of land to accommodate just 300,000 resting people. In due time, the cemeteries be filled up and the next land should be sacrificed for the dead.

Will we ran out of land?

With Earth’s 149 million km² of land surface, there’s obviously enough room for the living and the dead. But as much as we wanted to respect those who passed away, the living could use the finite space as valuable resource to actually live.

We demand living space. The average size of homes in the US is 2,438 ft², according to the survey of the National Association of Home Builders. We also need more land for the community’s social needs – schools, cathedrals, parks, factories, roads, famine and the list never ends. And since nobody would want to live in a village or plant their crops that’s been a cemetery before, the land of the dead is of little use to the living and thus, uneconomical.

The simple option to resolve the conflict of interest is cremating our loved ones. This method is increasingly popular with 40% rate in the US. Interestingly, Japan, with just 377,900 km² land area, cremates 99.85% of their dead. The Japanese graveyards are also tight in space, which is practical given their limited land area.

Cremation saves resources for the living. Urns require less space than coffins. Some families even prefer to keep the remains and place the ornamented urn inside the house. And some will opt to release the ashes back to the environment. The average cost of a traditional funeral is $6,560, while the cremation service through a funeral home is ranging from $2,000 to $4,000. The cremation process alone, should anyone decided to skip a funeral, could be as low as $700 to $1,000. This gives more money and land to utilize for the living’s benefit.

While living, people may already have planned their resting ground. They may have already bought a lot in the cemetery or have requested their family on how they wanted to be rested in peace. Earth can handle either burying or cremation, for now.

Would you like to be cremated or buried six feet under ground?

Problem: Too Much Religion and Denominations

Beside politics, religion is the most heated topic for discussion. Representative of a religion can have a strong tendency to defend his own belief, even to the point of criticizing other religions to address the dominance of his adherence. The other person will do the same, but siding his opposing devotion. The battle never ends since this is a clash of faith. You don’t have to prove it; you just have to believe it strongly as if it’s the absolute truth.

We don’t need an argument for religion to affect our interactions. There are prejudice against Muslims, Buddhists, and even atheists. There is in any religion, even to the devout Christians. It separated several couples because of families in disapproval. People are persecuted because of unmatched beliefs.

Does too much religion separate us?

Analysts argue that world religion is shrinking. But the major religions still keep a massive population of believers. Here is the tally of the top 10 organized religions by the world statistics of Adherents.com.

Christianity: 2.1 billion
Islam: 1.5 billion
Nonreligious: 1.1 billion
Hinduism: 900 million
Chinese traditional religion: 394 million
Buddhism: 376 million
primal-indigenous: 300 million
African Traditional & Diasporic: 100 million
Sikhism: 23 million
Juche: 19 million

There is also growing number of denominations within the above-listed religions. Buddhsim can be furthered into Theravada and Mahayana. Islam can be furthered into Sunni, Shi’a, Ahmadiyya and Sufism. Christianity can be furthered into Catholicism, Protestantism, Orthodoxy, Anglicanism, Mormonism and hundreds more.

There are thousands of religions and denominations in the world. It doesn’t take an elaborate history to form one; it only needs a founder.

On January 5, 2012, a little more than a year ago, Swedish jurisdiction acknowledges Kopimism as a legitimate religion. Founded by 19-year-old philosophy student Isak Gerson, adherents believe that file sharing is a sacred act. One of their symbols appears to be a Yin-Yang balance with Ctrl-C on top of Ctrl-V. Computer users and lazy pupils recognize these as copy and paste.

Among the fastest growing religions in the 2000s was Jediism. Based on the blockbuster sci-fi movie series Star Wars, adherents practice the spiritual and philosophical implications of the movies. They believe in the “Force” and observe the “Jedi Code”.

Another religion added in the 20^th century was The Creativity Movement. It is an atheistic approach that concentrates on the white people’s seclusion. In the words of the founder Ben Klassen, “united and organized the White Race is ten times more powerful than the rest of the world put together”.

Pastor James Emery White compared the foundation of new religions to starting a business. A million people found their businesses; but 40% dies by year one, 80% by year five. New churches and denominations share the same fate. White enumerates “Lack of Ministry Gifts, Lack of Money, Wandering in No-Man’s-Land, Failure to Contextualize and Small-Church Mentality” as the reasons why most ceased.

However, once a religion firmly proved that they’re renitent, they are added to the list of world religions and denominations. With too much to choose from, certain perspectives can construe to an individual.

Is it possible to have two non-conflicting religions? A Christian can believe in the trinity and still apply the Buddhist meditation. A Shintoist can diligently practice her vocation and also agree that there’s a “Force” within her that has a vast potential.

Can crossovers like this unite the world religions, or will it complicate it even more? If you have an answer to all these questions, what makes it right? It’s based on beliefs again.

Body Image Dichotomy: Thinspo vs Fitspo

In the realm of body image, one of the highest trending search topics are Thinspo (abbreviation for Thin Inspiration) and Fitspo (short-hand for Fitness Inspiration). The idea and popularity behind Thinspo has been increasing particularly among young women the past couple years. Books have been written regarding this relatively new and shocking craze.

Thinspo is essentially the glorification of eating disorders as a form of weight-loss and being “healthy.” The main eating disorder Thinspo enthusiasts support is “Ana” short for Anorexia. In order to encourage starvation or food resistance, Thinspo enthusiasts surround themselves with emaciated photographs of what their ideal body image will be.

Erroneous Body Image

Continuously seeing these images helps to reinforce the resistance to eat, and to continue starvation. Thinspo enthusiasts see this as a healthy goal, and their desire for “perfection” reaches unhealthy extremes. The internet has been flooded with images of “models” with bulging bones, gaunt faces, and dead eyes. Support groups for Thinspo are at an all-time high. Trying to reason with Thinspo enthusiasts seems to be a lost cause because their desire for stick-thin figures is so strong that they are willing to do anything to be “skinny”.

As Thinspo diets (or lack thereof) increase in popularity, women on the opposite spectrum of this craze have retaliated with the newer health craze “Fitspo.” Fitspo is a mixture of clean eating and exercise, basically the epitome of good health. The same process resides within this trend of circulating photos of women with rock hard abs, and women eating healthy foods to reinforce good and positive health habits.

The difference between the two trends is stark and challenges anyone who attempts to achieve skinniness and perfection. They are two extremes of different body types, both attempting to claim the title as “healthy” looking. Whether it be starvation or over-exercising can result in loss of body fat which will ultimately result in Amenorrhea in women, which is the body’s way of shutting down the reproductive system by stopping the production of estrogen until a healthier equilibrium of fat and health is achieved. The results and requirements of both Thinspo and Fitspo are at a pinnacle.

Whether you want to lose a few vanity pounds or an extreme amount of weight, doctors and health experts would agree that Thinspo is not the healthy route, and is dangerous when attempted. Eating sensibly, avoiding processed foods, and getting adequate exercise 3-5 days a week is the healthy alternative for anyone trying to lose weight and be healthier over all. Depriving your body of nourishment is not. Think smart, eat smart, and be healthy.

Yawning – What For?

Air is coming in, it’s coming in, it’s coming in. Now it’s in the highest of high stretching my fully expanded mouth. I closed my eyes, stretched my arms and exhaled air back out. Yaaaaawwnnn. Ah, that’s satisfying.

We’re told guesses on why we yawn. It is a response when the brain needs oxygen. People think that it preludes sleep. But contradictories dismissed them. We don’t yawn while we’re exercising – the time when oxygen use is expeditious. Singers yawn before taking the stage – which doesn’t sound like a drowsy person.

But yawning has an alerting effect. It keeps us wake and more responsive. And it just felt damn good.

It may cool our brain as it sends air towards our headspace. Albany researchers found that those with cold packs in their foreheads are less likely to yawn than those with warmer packs. Since our brains burns a third of our calorie intake, it’s hot enough. It needs some cooling mechanism and yawning is some sort of our ventilation.

Yaaaaaaaaawwwnnnn. That’s a long one, really passionate. Writing YAWN couple of times won’t keep my mouth closed.

Everybody yawns. A growing 11 weeks old fetus already knows how to yawn. 50% of those who’ve seen other people yawning did the same. Probability is higher when we have a closer relationship with the yawner, says University of Pisa’s Elisabetta Palagi. Even dogs yawn with their owners, says Lund University’s Elainie Madsen. Many called this an evidence of empathy.

An interesting theory thinks yawning is a threat. Since it opens the mouth and exposes the sharp teeth, it may be considered as an aggressive behavior among certain species. The alpha primates yawn more frequently than the beta population. The leader is thought to yawn first while the rest follows to keep them alert in the wild. Thus, yawn is associated with dominance.

Even more intriguing, yawning is claimed to be a sign of sexual attraction. I don’t know but perhaps these scientists are bored.

How many times did you yawn while reading this?

Exploring and Extracting Resources from Space

The planet we live in can suffice our necessities. There are enough animals to hunt and plants to cultivate. There’s enough room to fill everybody’s space. We even find rocks to collect for luxurious desires.

But there’s not enough abundance of resources in Earth for us. And we know that there’s more out in the space.

There is a plan to mine precious metals from asteroids. Scientists believe that these entreating minerals, including platinum, iron and gold, came from asteroids showering earth millions of years back. Now they wanted to contact directly the source. According to Astronomer John S. Lewis, “a relatively small metallic asteroid with a diameter of one mile contained more than $20 trillion worth of industrial and precious metals”.

Planetary Resources Inc. headed the project with high-profile investors and supporters from director James Cameron, Google executives Larry Page and Eric Schmidt and the former US Presidential Candidate Ross Perot.

Fossil fuels are expensive economically and environmentally. There’s no major movement to deviate from it and our electricity demands are even more insistent. One proposal is to extract helium-3 from the moon’s soil to power our lights. It is more efficient that hydrocarbons and nuclear plants.

The pioneer of space exploration, National Aeronautics and Space Administration or NASA also hopes to extract lunar water. The search continues for other resources discovery from the US government agency.

The question is, who owns the space?

China is set to launch a lunar rover this 2013. The robot explores the surface and extracts nuclear fuel along the way. Russia hopes to revive its Russian robotic space program. They are landing robots to the Moon, Venus and Mercury as early as 2014. The European Space Agency awaits approval to send a robotic space plane that will soar in the orbit. Japan launches a cargo craft to space station. India celebrates the 101^st mission to space.

Now everybody’s into it.

Is it a race to space?

People in Amusement Parks

I recently returned from a 10 day vacation, where I went to Disney World, Universal Studios and Islands of Adventure in Orlando Florida. On my trip I participated in one of my favorite activities – People Watching. In an environment where you are surrounded by people, from all over the world and of all age groups you can’t help but notice the way people behave at amusement parks.

Whether it be Disney, Universal, or Islands of Adventure, the types of people in these parks are similar, and everyone fits a sort of character type. There are the parents that brought the kids that are too young to ride anything and got stuck pushing them around in the stroller while trying to dodge the kids running around without supervision. You have the group of people that are visiting as a team for some sport or event, that all wear matching t-shirts and ride everything as a group, usually clapping and chanting their slogans or mantras as they embark on each new ride. There’s the couple you are stuck behind in line, that can’t seem to keep their hands off each other and the closer you get to the ride, the heavier the couple gets with the PDAs.

Roller Coaster Loop, Disneyland

One of my favorites is the father who is trying to get his kid to face his/her fears by riding one of the most intense roller coasters in the park, meanwhile the kid has nearly pissed his/herself in fear, and will resent their father in the future for making them do this. There’s the overly enthusiastic growth spurt kids, who this year get to ride the coasters that their height wouldn’t allow the year before. There is the young group of adolescent boys whose only interest is riding the girls who are dressed inappropriately for a family oriented amusement park.

“Honeydukes” Candy shop in Hogsmeade, Islands of Adventure

There’s the guy who has has already invested time and far too much money to win the large stuffed animal in hopes of carrying the bulky thing around to impress onlookers. Let’s not forget the incessant photo takers, who stop dead in their tracks nearly causing you to collide into them, just so they can take a picture, and these are the same people that spend more of their time exploring the souvenir shops while taking photos of the scenery. And of course there are the people that only seem to come to amusement parks for the food, and who you never see ride rides, but you can see them throughout the park sitting on a bench devouring a turkey leg or inhaling ice-cream before it melts; meanwhile they stare on at the kids walking around who are actually surprised at how soaked they got after going on a water ride even though they saw beforehand the results of the people that rode before them.

Rip Saw Falls Water Ride, Islands of Adventure

Procrastinators and Planners

A procrastinator will sleep his full hours and then will wake up for a coffee while watching the doves dangle on sagging electrical lines. He will gather his presentation for his speaking engagement in the last 30 minutes. After all, he only needed half an hour of preparation.

A planner will take the night to assemble his speech and materials. He will practice and anticipate possible circumstances to attempt control over the impending situation. Once all is polished, he will then rest and calm himself as everything is well-managed.

Is one strategy better than the other?

There is greatness in procrastination. The National Sleep Foundation argues that the workplace loses $18 billion worth of productivity due to sleepiness. A period of relaxation is requisite to optimal functionality of our own selves. Doing after resting is productive.

Social psychologists Dianne Tice and Roy Baurmeister studied how procrastinations affected college students. Those who procrastinated experience higher stress levels than those who didn’t. The time off balances the deadline scare.

But the door is slammed on procrastinators many times. Researcher Piers Steel called procrastination an “irrational delay”. They are called lazy, dumb and barren lads. Yet the world has known procrastinating achievers in the names of Leonardo da Vinci, St. Augustine, Bill Clinton and Abraham Lincoln.

Many have advocated planning. It is focused on achieving what needs to be done. It is more efficient as they use the time to gather resources for delivering the best output from sedate deliberation. They are the now-doers and no waiting in between.

There are also disadvantages of planning. Even after spending as much time needed for perfect planning, the unpredictable will come and errors will occur. If the planner can’t adapt to that, he’s done. But if everything happened according to the plan, the outcome is near perfect. Achieving planners include Confucius, Steve Jobs, Henry Ford and Benjamin Franklin.

Essentially, procrastination is leisure first before play; planning is work first before leisure. If the balance between leisure and work is not satisfied, there is a chronic problem. If the procrastinators waited too long for the best time, it will never come. If the planners tried to isolate every factor of the situation, he won’t be successful.

Anything could happen in procrastinating and planning. Both tactics have produced world influencers while the other edge damaged some who strategized badly. It comes down to what fits the person.

Are you a professional procrastinator or planner?

Can’t.. Hold.. It.. Longer (Extend Your Bladder)

If we were animals, we could just pee anywhere whenever needed.

But now that we are civilized, it’s inappropriate to just leak it out while you’re in the car with your friends in the middle of a busy street. Someone threw the punch line right and you tried to laugh with them but deep inside you’re in agony and you fantasize on turning the air-conditioner off.

You can’t just let it drizzle while standing in a U2 concert but you can’t hold it any longer and you’ll miss “With or Without You” which is your fucking song and the crowd is too much of a hassle to deal with and now you’re regretting the damn large strawberry banana smoothie.

You can’t wet your bed because you’re too fastidious to sleep on urinated sheets and you’re tired and lazy to get up but your full bladder is bothering you and you’re still confused what to do and sleep is drifting away. All you can say is, damn you bladder!

Doesn’t it suck that we have to hold it in? We’re only allowed to pee in a room designed for it.

There are a few techniques that could help extend your bladder’s life.

Holding-the-pee position works! Cross your legs when standing, open them when sitting, tighten your urethra and restrict the muscles surrounding it. It’s a comical pose but it just helps you last longer. Caution though on the lower stomach – you don’t want to put pressure on it. Fake a smile but don’t laugh. Laughing will contract your stomach muscles and may squeeze your bladder. And avoid sudden movements.

Don’t think about it. Stay away from a peeing image in your mind as it induces your need to do it. Forget the relief you’ll feel after it’s over. And obviously, don’t even dare to drink more fluids. Slap anybody who opens a can of coke or describes the sound of a flushing toilet. It’s best to find a distraction.

Warm up. Cold temperature makes your body want to dispose your urine. It doesn’t want to spend energy on keeping the urine warm because it’s a waste. Have a warm surrounding and your body will worry less.

If you can’t hold it any longer and you know it’s coming out, find a bottle and go. Or just go and get it over with.

Dr Elizabeth Farrell informs that peeing once every four hours is a normal frequency. Taking the trip to the toilet in under two hours is too frequent. Forcing to pee before leaving, she adds, should never be done as the bladder shrinks if it doesn’t reach full volume.

Dr. Chamandeep Bali warns the dangers of holding the pee. If done too often, the body “might lose the ability to know when it’s time to go”. Bacteria could build-up resulting to infections in kidney, urinary tract and bladder.

Holding it until it’s full is the ideal. Pee not too often and not too seldom.

Where else have you peed beside the restroom?

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