Most days you follow the limit. You know the roads like your phone number – 45 miles plus 5 allowance. You abide by it but today, the slug in front is bugging you and you sped up to overtake. Or you’re catching a store that’s closing down. Or Snoop Dogg’s on the radio and while nostalgia kicks in, you lost track. Or you’re just feeling adventurous, a change for a day. And then you hear that dreaded siren – it’s a cop on a motorcycle!
You pulled over, obeyed to show your license and then the speech. What can you do to avoid a speeding ticket?
Before you practice your act after being pulled over, the trick starts with the car. Make sure it’s well maintained. Clean it and fix all that is a noticeable damage. You wanted to communicate that you’re a law-abiding citizen and you look out for your vehicle.
Related: Do Red Cars Really Get More Tickets?
Observe the road. See if there’s a highway patrol or cops on standby. Obviously, you need to show off when they’re around. Do not speed when you’re alone on the road. Stay in the pack of speeding cars to diffuse the chances – you’re just driving like anybody else. Just make sure you’re not the leader as they’re the first on target. Avoid the fast lane because cops lurk around that side and they know drivers often outlaw the limit there. Staying in the middle is the safest.
When you see a cop on the sideroad and it’s too late to slow down, wave at him. It’s more common for cops to be avoided than to be greeted. Waving will got them thinking and distracted. Is this somebody I know? If they waved back, then drive on.
Now, to the speech.
Kindly deny. Admitting it is sure fire to a fine. Never fight the cop as aggression rarely gets to anything.
Put on a dramatic face. Saying that you have to poop or something hurts is not believable when you look golden. Act with your excuse. This is more effective for women because not many can resist a sobbing lady than a weeping grown man.
Complicate your accent. If you have a foreign look, then use it to your advantage. Make your English crooked, grammar mishap and enunciation pricky. Make it painful to talk to you and he’ll dismiss you.
The Humorous Approach. Matt Hardigree of jalopnik.com can put up an excellent scenario.
Officer: Where are you going in such a hurry?
Me: Just keeping up with traffic, officer
Officer: I don’t see any traffic
Me: That’s how far behind I am, I was trying to keep up! (insert unfunny drum noise) “da dum ching”
Officer: Just slow down. (walks back to car shaking head)
If they don’t laugh just say “What are you, the joke police?”
The best way to avoid the ticket is not speeding up, but this happens. What’s your best approach?
